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Top Ten Sexiest Women in the Marvel Universe

Okay, I know that a lot of you tech savvy geeks like me have seen a whole bunch of "Top Ten" lists for various things. Seeing so many, I think we can all agree on two things: 1) Many of them concern comic book characters and 2) Many of them suck. In fact, they suck so much, they inspire us to make our own Top Tens. Here is mine: "The Top Ten Sexiest Women in the Marvel Universe."

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Number 10: The Invisible Woman Before Sue Richards was the wielder of force fields and invisibility and mother of two, she was the beautiful model and actress, Susan Storm. Her sexuality has been played down in her early years. Originally, her charms convinced Reed to let Johnny be a part of the team, and assured that Ben Grimm, The Thing, stuck around after Reed turned him into an orange boulder. Look it up! It's all true! She has flirted with a relationship with Namor, the Sub-Mariner, and talked him into becoming not only an ally of the Fantastic Four, but of the second generation of superhero groups in the Marvel Universe. Her changing costumes have reflected her changes as a woman, and her growth as a character from completely covered, to revealing, as in the Infinity Wars. Honorable mentions in her same class of beauty include Crystal, Medusa, Vapor, and Roulette.



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Number 9: Hepzibah Mam'selle Hepzibah, also known as Zee and Lady Kitten, struck a cord in me the first time I saw her in the Starjammers. She has been increasingly depicted as a feline rather than a skunk, contrary to her creation as a nod of homage to Miz Mam'selle Hepzibah from Walt Kelly's Pogo comic strip. She's always been shown as shapely, agile, and just fuzzy enough to keep you warm at night. Like all members of her race, she emits pheromones that can take a person into ecstasy and goes into a seasonal heat. Oh, and did I mention that she is an intergalactic pirate chick? I think she has secretly appealed to the dirty little furry in all of us fanboys and has spiced up Marvel writing for years. Honorable mentions of furry sexiness include Tygra, Deathbird, Nocturne, and Squirrel Girl.

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Number 8: Thena Thena, borne Azura of the Eternals, was the successor of Zuras, Ruler of the Eternals of Earth, until she lost her position to Ikaris who challenged her because of her love of Kro, ruler of the Eternals' long time enemies, The Deviants. She was named to mirror Athena, as token of peace between the Eternals and Olympian Gods. For some reason, she has never really gotten her due in the Marvel Universe. She has the figure that I always wanted The Enchantress to have. She has the sweetness and compassion to actually fall in love with her enemy. Oh, and she is a super-stacked smoking hot blonde that loves to wear shiny golden body suits. Honorable mentions of goddess gorgeousness include the Enchantress, Sersi, and Power Princess.

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Number 7: She-Hulk Jennifer Walters is a lawyer that lost a case for the mob and needed an emergency blood transfusion to live. The only person that could save her was her travelling cousin, Bruce Banner, who was running from the law because of The Hulk. This is also the reason she became the emerald goddess and powerhouse, The Sensational She-Hulk! Just as her cousin's physique goes above and beyond that of the perfect man, so does her form for women. The only reason she was limited to 7 was the fact that her bulk has changed over the years depending on artists and story-arcs. Her best depictions can be seen in her second volume of comic, The Sensational She-Hulk. Honourable with her charms include Jarrella, Gamora, Nebula, and Lyra, her alternate reality niece.

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Number 6: Spider-Woman Jessica Drew obtained her powers in a mad gamble to save her life, that included putting her in suspended animation to aid in her recovery. She emerged with powers that make the original Spider-Man look like he was cheated. One of her powers that makes her so sexy is her pheromone power that can make both sexes deathly afraid of her, as well as extremely attracted. As Spider-Woman she wears a full body suit that hits her just right in all the right places. The patterns seem to showcase all of her curves and frame her lady lumps so well. In short pheromones plus skin-tight body suit equals donkey ride to Heaven. I always thought that Carol Danvers's costumes and curves would compliment Spider-Woman's well in a...group activity. Honourable mentions in bodysuit beauty include Carol Danvers, Diamondback, the Black Panther (Shuri), Black Cat, and Hellcat.

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Number 5: Madelyn Pryor A lot of you fellow fanboys are going to be upset and wonder why I chose Madelyn over the much more famous and classically lusted after original. I defend my action by saying that in my opinion, Madelyn Pryor was way sexier than the Jean Grey. She had attitude and an edge from her resentment of always being compared and being used as a substitute for Jean Grey. Madelyn really came into her own as the Goblin Queen. She dresses the way Scott wishes Jean would have, and brings back memories of Jean Grey as the Black Queen (ahhh...). Maybe if Jean did dress like Madelyn, Cyclops wouldn't have had that affair with Emma Frost... Honourable mentions of redhead sensuality include Rachel Grey, Mary Jane Watson, and Jean Grey (duh).

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Number 4: Selene Gallio Also known as the Black Queen, and simply Selene, she was a mutant with potential immortality before her ascension into godhood. She has preyed upon mankind for well over 15,000 years as a "psychic vampire" As most Inner Circle ladies, she is sexy, lusty, and not afraid to show it in her attitude, dress, and actions. To tell you the truth, I was considering putting Emma Frost, her White Queen counterpart, as tied for Number 4, but I would not be true to myself. I have always thought Selene was sexier than Emma Frost, despite the fact that I think most would say they like Emma Frost better...hey, my "Top Ten..." Honourable mentions in dominatrix appeal include Emma Frost, Umar, and Viper.

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Number 3: Psylocke Psylocke is the twin sister of Captain Britain, and a mutant telepath. She was already a beautiful character when artist Jim Lee transformed her into an Asian assassin for The Hand in a sleek and revealing purple body suit, that matched her beautiful purple hair. Over the years her powers have changed, but she is still basically that sexy minx of an assassin that Jim Lee made her to be. Many of the reasons I like her are the same reasons that I like Selene, except she also kicks ass! At one time she could break your mind and your body at the same time. Imagine those powers used in the sack...yeah...sexy telepath...reading your fantasies...damn...Well, she has telekinesis instead now, but that can be useful as well. Honourable mentions of kickass beauties include Elektra, the Black Widow(Natalia Romanova), Mystique, Madam Hydra, and the Silver Sable.

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Number 2: Opal Luna Saturnyne Opal Luna Saturnyne was the Majestrix of Earth's Omniverse. She was also one of many aspects of such people known as Courtney Ross, a wealthy business woman, and Sat-Yr-9, a would be conqueror from al alternate Earth that the Nazi's won WWII. Most of her aspects are just as fine as her and identical. Sat-Yr-9 is just as nasty and sexy as you expect her to be; in fact she kills Courtney Ross, dresses like her, and then goes downstairs to have sex with her date and former boyfriend, Captain Britain, downstairs. Tall, voluptuous, platinum blonde, and with a dimensional domain on a cosmic level, she almost made it to Number 1 in this Top Ten. Honourable mentions in cosmic beauty and blonde dominion include Megan, Roma, Kismet, and Shana the She-Devil.

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Number 1: Storm Storm is sexy. 'SEXY. She has transformed herself to reflect her different aspects from being a thief, a goddess, a mutant, a human, a Morlock, an X-Man, and a wife. Part of her mutant power is that she has all of the rarest traits from all of the races on Earth, from her perfect complexion and skin colour, her blue and sometimes cat-slit eyes, and her long flowing alabaster hair. She is regal and majestic. Her body is full and supple. Her powers make her a force of nature...literally. Her weather control powers make her one with nature and give her a physical and psionic rapport with Earth. She enjoys her nudity and is not ashamed to share it. How could she not get the top slot? Honourable mentions in majestic beauty and power include Zaladane, Poloaris, and the Scarlet Witch.

You don't agree? Then do something about it! Comment! Share your list! We'd love to hear about it! In fact, share this and any other article on our site with your friends and discuss them, and come back and comment. We love the feedback and conversation!
By: Jason O. N. Roberts aka HERETICPRIME of Otaku no Baka


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"The Hobbit" (1977) Review

blogEntryTopperI have a real treat for you today All Good Fans. I'm home from my local Value Village where I found a copy of The Hobbit on DVD just sitting in a bin! It must be some rough cut which accidentally made its way out of the studio. That's even better than when someone found a rough draft of the Star Wars script in my local library. Its cover doesn't even have the actors, just some of what I assume to be concept art. I'm so excited that I had to start writing this before even watching it. So keep reading and be amongst first to know everything you have wanted to about Peter Jackson's the Hobbit.

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This is not Peter Jackson's The Hobbit. Upon watching for 90 seconds I can tell you this is definitely not Peter Jackon's The Hobbit. How embarrassing. I guess I'll just have to review it anyway. Instead keep reading to be amongst the who knows how many to know everything you never knew you wanted to know about Rankin Bass' The Hobbit.

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The Hobbit, for those of you who don't know, is the 1937 story about Bilbo Baggins; a reserved fixture of his Hobbit community who one day receives a visit from a wizard and twelve Dwarves that wish to hire him as their expert treasure hunter (e.g. burglar) on a grand adventure across the land to take back what's theirs from a powerful dragon. Of course, Mr. Baggins has no need for dragon treasure, knows nothing of burgling nor has ever been on an adventure but he reluctantly joins them anyway and begins his unexpected journey through Middle-Earth. On his journey, Bilbo learns just how great the world is through its fantastic creatures & settings, changing himself from a quiet homebody to an adventurer of legend.

This version of The Hobbit was released as an animated television special in 1977 from the same production company that would later make The Last Unicorn and Thundercats as well as animated by oh, Topcraft! Topcraft was an animation team who's members later formed a new company you may have heard of called Studio Ghibli. I've got to admit, the animation in this is pretty sharp, especially for 1970s television and I generally really like the art direction/character designs they used even if they took some, shall we say, creative liberties in those designs. For example, Gollum looks like a frog with ears and Smaug has a cat for a face. Now it's been a long time since I've read the novel but to be fair, I don't recall it ever specifically saying he DOESN'T have a cat for a face.

But likewise, the plot and dialogue stay surprisingly faithful to the source material with the exception of few omitted sections (such as the part with Beorn) and some plot points streamlined due to time constraints. It really makes me wonder how Peter Jackson intends to stretch this story out into three movies when this one did it in, let me check my DVD, 77 minutes! Even the music uses the actual lyrics from the poems and songs in the novel, which is a nice touch and now that we've brought it up - the music. Oh the music.

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The music is, honestly, it's pretty cheesy. So much so that South Park even made references to how goofy it is with their infamous Lemmywinks episode. Try the links to compare and you'll quickly hear what I mean. Otherwise the sound is generally quite good. The cast includes Hans Conried as Thorin Oakenshield, um Otto Preminger as Thranduil and uh John Huston as Gandalf? What?! Alright, it's an excellent if not random collection making the cast and they do a great job portraying the characters, maybe even better than their live-action counterparts. So overall, I like this. I really like this.

I'd recommend it and if you would like to see this version to compare it with the Peter Jackson version, officially coming to theaters on December 14, 2012, then it is available on DVD along with various digital streaming services. Surprisingly, despite the upcoming live-action adaptation, however, I unfortunately could find no plans to release this on Bluray, which is a shame because if nothing else this is a fun little adventure that should not be forgotten even if future versions turn out to be even better.


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Mini Review - Barry Levinson's "The Bay"

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The first thing I thought when I saw this on iTunes is: “What’s the director of ‘Rain Man” and ‘Disclosure’ doing messing around with a found footage flick?” Then I realized it probably wouldn’t be too bad expressly because of Barry Levinson’s involvement, and I was right. The Bay is an ecological disaster thriller focusing on a strange biological organism that has infested the eponymous body of water in the title. As a result, all manner of grotesqueries ensue - I guarantee you’ll squirm. One really smart thing Levinson did here was rely on a critter for the bad guy that actually exists in real life - the super creepy looking, ancient isopoda. These things feed on just about anything that drops to ocean floor, but they also occasionally crawl to the surface making for a nice fright fest. (It reminded me a little of Ridley Scott using "Nottingham lace,” which is the lining of a cow's stomach, for the interior of the original egg in Alien.) However, in reality, isopods they don’t own up to their menacing appearance. Since most people have probably never heard for them, it which allows them to make for an effective baddie and they also look super realistic because, obviously, they are.

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The movie has a brisk pace and starts off with an infected person having a meltdown at a town fair. All of this is reported to us by the super cute and curvy Kether Donohue, who plays a reporter telling the story from some unknown location after it all went down. She’s one of the survivors. Of course we learn that greed is at the heart of all this, as a corporation tied in with local politicians has been dumping tons of chicken dung right next to the bay for longer than anyone can remember. The chickens were farm raised on steroids and their manure, consumed by the isopods, causes organisms to become faster growing, aggressive, human flesh eaters.

The movie got a 75% on Rotten Tomatoes, which for once is about right. It’s not a top tier horror movie, but it’s definitely not bad either. Check it out.


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Olivia Jensen - Thanksgiving Homegrowns

blogEntryTopperIn a way, Olivia Jensen was the first AGT model, since she did the promo for the site. She will eventually do her own review for the site, but in the meantime, here are some homegrown pics.
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Mini Review - Amir Avni - Artist

One of the great things about blogging is that it allows you connect with talented creative people you might not have otherwise met. Amir Avni is a great artist from Canada who did the original of Mal Malloy that I featured on Indosplace.

Amir was nice enough to update his initial sketch with the below drawing, which I really like. His style reminds me a little of John Kricfalusi (Ren & Stimpy). Amir is also an animator on a new Cartoon Network show called Grojband, so check him out.

Grojband Promo

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Mal Malloy AGT T-Shirt

Internet sensation Mal Malloy is seen here sporting the new AGT tees designed by Winterart which can be purchased here. Look for Mal to do upcoming reviews. More pics (and maybe some video) coming shortly… You can also see further pics on Indosplace and Mal’s Tumblr.

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